the postman delivers but not first class
the postman a film review by michael redman copyright 1997 by michael redman
[warning : my opinion of this film is definitely in the minority of reviewers perhaps because it hits so many of my cinematic buttons : post-apocalypse stories , hope in a desperate situation , grassroots uprisings and kevin costner .
even worse , i thought that ” waterworld ” was watchable .
read the following with those particular grains of salt . ]
it’s the year 2013 and things have fallen apart .
due to a world war in the late nineties , the resulting three-year winter and a devastating plague , life in the former united states has been reduced to isolated primitive fiefdoms .
although this is the future , it looks like a western .
as the film opens , kevin costner ( his character’s name is never revealed ) is wandering the utah wastelands with only his mule bill for company .
giving extraordinarily bad shakespearean performances in exchange for food and lodging , costner is an outsider in a land of outsiders .
running into even worse luck , he is forcibly conscripted into the racially pure holnist army of general bethlehem ( will patton ) .
the rag-tag retro-futuristic cavalry is the descendent of militia groups and is even called the ” clan ”
after a brutal boot camp , he ( and you can see this coming a mile away ) escapes .
taking shelter in a wrecked postal truck , he liberates the uniform and mail bag from the skeleton in the cab who no longer has a use for either .
once he reaches oregon , land of beautiful women , bright youngsters and rock and roll ; he pretends to be a representative from the ” restored congress of the united states of america ” .
this scam gets him inside the walled towns where the promise of mail delivery renews optimism in the hearts of the inhabitants .
food and other opportunities come his way in the form of spirited abby ( olivia williams ) who wants him to father a child because her husband is sterile .
shortly her husband is killed by bethlehem and she and the postman ( as costner is referred to for the rest of the film ) become a reluctant item .
although the postman knows he’s running a fraud , the concept of renewed communications sets the kids’ imagination afire ( especially ford lincoln mercury ( larenz tate ) , his second-in-command ) and they form a new pony express dedicated to getting the mail through .
the revived postal service doubles as an army to fight the holnists’ tyranny .
the postman has become a symbol for hope in a rube goldberg manner .
although the movie appeals to my sensibilities , there are so many things wrong with it that they can hardly be counted .
it’s derivitive of costner’s own ” waterworld ” and clint eastwood westerns .
there’s little here that we haven’t seen dozens of times before .
the film is often down-right corny .
a scene where the postman is on horseback and grabs a letter from the hands of a bright-eyed child is embarrassing in its slow-motion banality .
the film’s final few minutes should have been left on the cutting room floor .
despite the film’s excessive three hour length , several things are never explained .
what was the war about ?
how did civilization change so rapidly ?
everyone has horses : where did all they come from ?
the ” law of eights ” that bethlehem lives by seems to have its origins somewhere beyond the film , but where ?
are we to believe that the rest of the world is in the same shape and hasn’t made their way west to help or conquer ?
there is some jumbled symbolism here that doesn’t appear to make sense .
the tale is obviously saying that communication can defeat evil in much the same way that the internet has the potential to topple governments , but beyond that there are some oddities .
the evil army is called ” holnists ” which sounds coincidentally like the new age ” holism ” , but why ?
is it another coincidence that it takes place in 2013 , just one year after many ancient prophesies ( including the ending of the mayan calendar ) predict a new world for mankind ?
why is the general named ” bethlehem ” ?
there seems to be some reason for that , but what ?
sometimes the movie feels like a joke .
an army of postal workers armed with guns ?
considering the headlines of recent years , it takes a tremendous leap of faith to cheer for these guys .
it’s even more difficult to accept those re-powering the federal government as the heroes .
given the current climate of the country and the distrust of big government , it’s asking a lot for the audience to get behind the film’s nationalism .
even with its numerous flaws , the movie all comes together , if only for those who have the same weaknesses that i have .
it’s doubtful that ” the postman ” is going to find much of an audience , but a few of us are going to have a good time .
besides we’re all awaiting the fall of civilization caused by the year 2000 millennium computer bug .
( michael redman has written this column for over 22 years and would like to announce that the ” michael redman ” arrested near indianapolis last week for accepting an illicit package from federal express is , to the best of his knowledge , not him .
perhaps this similarly-named person should have used kevin costner’s postal service . )