this review contains spoilers , but believe me , i don’t say anything you can’t guess 10 minutes into the movie .
i * did * go into this one with high expectations .
i had been exposed to media reports that this film would signify a departure from the slasher flicks .
i sort of expected another exorcist or the shining .
i even put aside my general rule of not seeing this type of film .
boy , was i wrong !
another garbage slasher flick , the only difference being that * this * one has a story !
the story , you ask ?
well , a scumball buys a chinese puzzle from a guy in an arab souk .
he takes it home , somehow getting it past customs : – ) and starts fiddling with it in his attic .
lo and behold , after he takes it apart , three demons appear and start taking him apart , but with meat hooks .
when they’re finished , his gizzards are hanging from the ceiling .
they botch up their cleanup job , however , and manage to leave his heart ( or some gland ; i didn’t really recognize the organ ) under a floorboard .
the guy’s brother and his brother’s wife appear at the door soon after , and decide to move in .
they throw away scumball’s belongings , and set up house .
turns out that wife is a bit of a nympho , and screwed around with scumball right before her marriage .
she starts having some wild hallucinations .
later , hubby spills some blood on the attic floorboards ( slow-mo special effects of the buckets of blood hitting the ground–all from the tiny cut on his hand ) .
said blood is eagerly sucked up by scumball’s organ .
the organ grows into a thing that requires yet more blood in order to complete the regeneration into a really ugly thing .
it establishes mind contact with wife , who agrees to help him get more blood , because she really wants to be screwed again .
so , she helps him kill three businessmen .
scumball , at this time , gradually gets his strength back and grows all his organs back .
problem is , he doesn’t have any skin , and even after three or four corpses , still doesn’t get any skin .
he finally gets some , though , but strangely enough , he ends up looking like his brother .
guess they couldn’t get the original actor back .
who knows .
scumball ( whose name is frank ) is not a nice guy .
he describes his torture by the demons fondly , as the ” ultimate pleasure and pain , since at that level there is no difference between the two . ”
somehow , i don’t see getting torn apart by 90 fish- and meat-hooks a lot of fun .
this guy is * so * bad ( ” how bad * is * he ? ” ) ,
* so * bad that the * rats * cower in a corner in fear .
for good reason , too ; he crucifies two of them for fun , and carves a third while the nympho’s horsing around with hubby .
anyway . hubby’s daughter ( who , if course , is not * wife’s * daughter ) starts to suspect something is wrong after she sees wife going into the attic with one of her johns and the ensuing screams .
the dumb bimbo meets scumball , and is not impressed .
she manages to escape with the chinese puzzle , and brings out the demons .
at any rate , the demons are pissed off that they screwed up their cleanup ; they’re normally quite meticulous about that type of thing .
the story boils down to the demons trying to correct their mistake .
the demons are not , however , the good guys .
the dumb bimbo’s the good guy .
she somehow not only gets them to take care of frank , but also banishes them to hell or oblivion , we’re not too sure which .
not too shabby for someone with single-digit iq .
this is basically a ” bad jinn ” story .
it is an * awful * movie .
awful acting , bad focus in the photography , many scenes of skin being penetrated by meathooks , which is really unrealistic , and looks like the latex that it is .
continuity ?
who cares .
acting ?
* terrible * .
script ?
horrible .
sounds canned .
unrealistic .
story is so-so , but the impact is lost long , long before the film ends .
i do think the * rat * acting was quite good .
i have never seen rats look afraid .
they should get nominated for an award .
really good acting there , the best in the movie .
” the envelope for best furry rodent , please . . . ”
a ” ” rating would be far too generous .
a ” 1/10 ” rating ( or -4 in the -4 to +4 rating system ) is far more accurate .
this movie is so bad that people in the audience were laughing , chortling at the bad acting and crummy dialog .
i can see this film turning into the next rocky horror picture show .
people were getting so fed up they were yelling warnings up to the characters on the screen .
had to have something to do .
dumb , dumb , dumb movie .
i was embarrassed that i spent money to see it .
it goes without saying that i disagree with the other reviews on the board that attempt to review the film for itself .
lots of slime and red-dyed corn syrup does not constitute ” horror , ” in my opinion .